Thursday, July 29, 2010

Snakes and Onions

I am shedding my layers of fat the way a snake sheds its skin.  Unlike the snake, my process of shedding will continue through the loss of many layers until I finally feel that I am naked to the world.
I am an onion.  Every thin layer I peel from my self is another pound lost.

Losing weight is really about removing layers of artifice and camouflage.  We, who are fat, are hidden beneath layers of weight we do not need.  These layers pad us and cushion us and separate us from the world.  In some ways, they insulate us from aspects of life.  Fat people may not have as many relationships with other people.  We might not participate in as many activities.  We may hold ourselves apart, separated from others by our layers of protection.  It takes courage to begin to remove the layers and to continue to remove them until we expose our true selves.  I sometimes fear the person I will find when the shedding is done.  Other times I am giddy with anticipation at meeting the person who hides inside me.  Mostly, I harbor the simple hope that I will recognize myself when all the extra layers are gone and I am left with my one true self.

1 comment:

  1. I think you will find that some days you may not recognize yourself when you look in the mirror, but when you walk around with no mirrors you might feel very much the same.

    What can be destabilizing is how differently people can *treat* you. (It definitely offers some insights into human nature, not all of them pretty.)