Sunday, August 29, 2010

Winning the Weight Loss Lottery

You know what is truly incredible? Being a human being. It's fantastic!! Think about it. What other creature has the ability to look at itself with a critical eye and then decide to transform itself to meet a new vision. All the time I listen to people saying "I cannot do that. I cannot lose weight," or "there is no way I could accomplish that." To them I say "bull pucky!" Of course you can do it. As a sentient creature, you certainly do have the ability to do whatever you set your mind to doing. The big question is not whether you CAN do it, but whether you are willing to make whatever sacrifices might be necessary. Therein lies the rub. Some people have managed to convince themselves that they are incapable of self-sacrifice. I still maintain that is a big fat barrel of bull pucky. In truth, I wonder if I simply have a greater advantage.

"How is that possible?" you ask. Well, sit right back and you'll hear a tale... I come from a long line of Puritan self-deniers. For hundreds of years, people in my family have said to themselves, "self, you do not NEED that, so learn to live without it." Now, I do not want you to think this meant that none of my ancestors accomplished anything significant. The opposite is true; my family blood line spawned more than its fair share of over achievers. Sadly, I am not one of them. But, I didn't come up completely empty in the genetic lottery. Besides the family gene for a wide butt and fat thighs, I also received the "satisfied with less than everything" gene.* That tiny bit of chromosomal magic is responsible for my unfailing dedication to the weight loss journey. I do not mind giving up goodies. I do not mind forcing myself to exercise. In my heart of hearts, I feel some sort of strange pride for doing without things that I want and for badgering myself into doing things I'm not always thrilled to do. Truly, it must be a vestige of great granny sixteen times removed. I can almost hear her telling me it's my family duty.

The bottom line?  While I am still a bit cranky about being genetically coded for the fat rear end, I'm glad I also glad that I was given the ability to get rid of it. And that is what I'm doing here on Highway 150. I'm getting rid of my blobby butt, losing my bulging belly, shrinking my fatty flappy bat wings, and tightening up my thunder thighs. I am a human, I have knowledge, and I am using that knowledge to shrink. Can it get any better than this?


* I also got some other cool genes like intelligence, great sense of humor, curly hair, empathy, and the ability to see through BS and concrete walls. I'm really not bitter about the fat ass gene. Really not. At all. Ever.


  1. I really enjoyed this post. I've got the fat-ass-and-thick-thighs gene, as well. However, the self-deprivation gene? Not so much. I come from a long line of hedonists. Fatties, alcoholics, adulterers, and all-around black sheep. We've also got some do-gooders in there (even a Revolutionary War hero), but mostly ne'er-do-wells. I agree that as humans we have the power to transform our lives, but I always feel I'm just one slip-up away from a plate of nachos and a 6-pack of beer! LOL

  2. I really enjoyed this post! Keep up the good work :D My ethics professor say that our ability to JUST SAY NO is what seperates us from the animals and I am one step away from hippopotamus!

  3. Welcome! Any friend of a hippo is a friend of mine :-D